Shop More Submit  Join Login
×



Details

Submitted on
August 22, 2013
Image Size
1.2 MB
Resolution
1115×1280
Link
Thumb
Embed

Stats

Views
79
Favourites
5 (who?)
Comments
8
×
Zero Tolerance by JadSMor Zero Tolerance by JadSMor
*Collapses in exhaustion*
I think I may have bitten off more than I could chew with this piece. I’ve only been drawing things seriously for a month and a half now. 4 Different anthro species in one was a little rough and I apologize if you have a vulture or bear or rabbit fursona, I only studied the anatomy briefly.
But that’s okay because I’m passionate about this topic. In fact get ready because with my remaining energy here comes a rant, I love drawing, but remember I’m a writer first and foremost.
I hate bullies. I was bullied terribly in elementary school, to the point that I would look at the kitchen knives as I was doing dishes and wonder how bad it would hurt if I used one to end my life. Well, I hit my growth spurt in early in middle school and by the time 9th Grade rolled around I was standing at well over 6 ft tall. Guess what? Bullying stopped, and never happened again. I’m generally a mellow guy, it takes a lot to get me mad, but the quickest route to that destination is bullying someone in front of me. I’ll only ask once for you to stop. After that …well (forgive my language I don’t normally swear) you can be damned sure that I’ll come over there and kick you hard enough to cause a gag reflex in the back of your throat.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconkelaiah:
Kelaiah Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
I'm glad God kept you from using those knives. I know what its like to be bullied too, although in retrospect it probably wasn't nearly as bad as yours'. But it did make me angry then, and it makes me angry now.
Reply
:icondindellathedefender:
DindellaTheDefender Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Anyways, enough of my unnecessary life story.

(I wrote a big long post just now, so I'll try to be brief this time. Gah, I'm so sorry. 3'|)

I absolutely adore your pose there and the clouds. <3 I obviously love the message behind this as well. I love the perspective and tile of the pool, however. . . is the fence intentionally at a different perspective? I know fences built around pools are usually lined up, although not always the case. I also recommend putting more effort into the fence post, since I think with a few touch-ups could look like a very amazing fence. It's pitch black with no real life to it, so it feels out of place. . . along with the grass. It's very brushy and blurry and you can see the line of the hill you built it upon straight through it. It's distracting from the rest of the picture because there's all these nice things and then a blub of blur. I can tell it was a rush job and that saddens me a bit there, since I know you do work hard on all your pieces.

If it helps you do backgrounds, do character lineart on one layer and background linearts on another. Same with color. Split them up. If you drew the background first, in some cases, it'll help you place the character. Or, you could draw the characters first and before coloring them put the entire background in, then color and shade your character accordingly. Removing the characters from the picture makes it less distracting so you can put equal effort more easily into both. :3
Reply
:iconjadsmor:
JadSMor Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013
P.S. your comment made me feel guilty so I went back and edited things. Its still not super high quality but I hope it fixed some of the issues.
Reply
:icondindellathedefender:
DindellaTheDefender Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Aw dear, don't feel guilty. It looks hoards better now, but do know that I do know you have a personal life and a smidget of sadness isn't worth going through all that, yeh? <3
Reply
:iconjadsmor:
JadSMor Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013
Yeah I did split it up onto different layers (I had everything separate), but what usually happens is I get so exhausted from the character art that by the time I get to the background I'm really just trying to finish by that point.  (Unlike the youtube speed artists it takes me about 3 hours just to get the sketch correct before I move on to actual line art and coloring). I would have liked to take more time but I had work the next day so I was on a tight schedule as far as when I wanted it finished. Although the fence was supposed to be in a different perspective than the pool, most of my backgrounds come from locations I've been and there is a local pool that I know of that is outdoors and the fence surrounding it has very different dimensions because half of the pool is blocked off by the rec center building.
Reply
:icondindellathedefender:
DindellaTheDefender Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Getting exhausted working on an art piece is actually more common then I think you realize. :'D I'm by no means a professional artist myself (though I'd love to be) and I can verify that any good piece will take ages and test your patience. The difference between me and you is that you don't let that stop you from finishing, even if you have to cur corners here and there (as every artist does), while I do let that stop me. I can spent anywhere from five to six hours just sketching. Hell, I've spent a maximum time of twelve hours sketching one of my commissions (that was just sketching, not the coloring part), which I'm actually amazed I pulled through because I was so frustrated and sick of looking at it and honestly should've looked up some anatomy so I wasn't guessing the whole time. . . It's the only thing I've dragged myself through so far and that's pretty horrible because it was, literally, just a sketch. It's not something I can show for myself and that's pretty depressing.

I think what I'm trying to say here, forgive me if I sound jumbly as I just got up maybe an hour ago (didn't manage to sleep until pretty early in the morning), is that even with any flaws I see or cut edges I find that I do look up to you as inspiration. What seperates an artist from a hobbyist are those who are willing to grit their teeth through all the nitty gritty and learn, draw, complete, and repeat. No matter the corners you cut, you are a true artist and you should take pride in that.
Reply
:icondindellathedefender:
DindellaTheDefender Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I like the story behind this picture. I know I faved this one first and then gave my critique to the other picture before this one, but man. . . I wasn't sure. . . what to say to this one at first and had to think about it. I mean, I know everyone (or I figure almost everyone) gets bullied. . . at least once, at least maybe even twice or three times, but hot damn everyone's bullying experience is different and the way we handle the situation different as well--even if it comes down to bullying situations that are similar. And indeed, there are situations that are similar to someone else's.

I've honestly had an experience much worse then bullying that has effected my life dramatically, but then I honestly spent my whole childhood being bullied so I can't honestly tell you the effects it had on me like that experience did. However, this isn't about that experience. This is about bullying. . . And I suppose in a way you could have called that bullying.

None-the-less. I'm Autistic/ADHD. Always have been, always will be, even with all the help I got growing up that has allowed me to act "normal" (whatever that is), and that is an obvious thing since there's no cure for that (nor, do I think, one is necessary). I was an odd child and I did not fit in. Literally from the moment I walked onto the bus, everyone decided I was the odd one out and it only got worse all the time. Most of the bullying I remember was psychological buttons people consistently kept pushing, because after a certain point I would literally black out mentally from minutes to hours and not remember a thing. Pressed to the point of becoming violently out of control, which wasn't but too terribly hard with my mental condition. I was the bottom of the bottom, the omega's omega, scapegoat of every single student around me. My parents could do nothing to help because they really weren't there to say what happened and they spent most of their time working, so there wasn't much they could do anyways (besides fight at the end of the year with all the staff that they should pass me despite my behavior and bad grades). My teachers, even if they wanted to help me and believe me could not because everyone would just say I did it. Do things just to get me in trouble and whether I did it or not it was my fault. Kids considered me a disease and made passing my "disease" around a game, touching me and then slapping it onto someone else. In order to avoid "catching Megan" was to put your fingers into a cross as if you were warding away the devil.

The first friend I ever had was murdered by his father (although this information I wasn't allowed to know until I was older). The second friend I ever had didn't truly care about me, she cared about what I happened to own that she didn't and has never grown out of lying to me. My third, fourth, and sixth friends were actually temporary and only my friends on certain days when their friends weren't at school and will to this day claim they never knew me personally or hung out with me. My fifth friend, her mother forbid me from ever speaking to her or seeing her ever again (which I actually obeyed). The only support I had really was my parents, but they were almost always at work except for my doctor appointments. My brother, while he put up with me outside of school, pretended it wasn't happening at all and ignored my existence until we were home or at the babysitter's house. Relatives outside the house treated me as if I were dirt or else ignored me, except for two people (one who was/is technically not a relative at all) who I only saw maybe once a year at most. To this day they will deny it all for they were oblivious they were doing it or else know they did it and are too prideful to say so (and my brother and parents can truly confirm this was the case).

Elementary school was the worst. The absolute worst. Middle school, I had some people I considered friends after a year or two, but I could never get close to people. In fact, I was full of despair, anger, and hate I never showed at school. Because of the doctor visits and medication, I was able to function more normally. The bullying never stopped, but it grew into more mature methods and I got better at ignoring it. I came home to nothing but fighting, too. As my parents didn't have to work so constantly any more, they found themselves filled with problems they hadn't faced in years and those problems only got worse as they found more problems to have problems about. It didn't help that Danny, my brother, had been in the hospital a few times. Shortage on money equals instant battle along with the stress of illness (or, well, in this case Chrones Disease). "He" happened in the weakest part of my life. The one who gave me the experience worse then bullying. I found solace in his stories, his fantasies that twisted my head and destroyed what little identity I had managed to find of myself since I had grown more able to find myself. I was trapped for years in this and as soon as I broke free, the "friend" who had gotten me unknowingly through it all found every reason she could to throw me to the side, confused, disoriented, and alone. I was so scatterbrained I didn't know who to turn to. I shut everyone out and it was at least a year before anyone truly came back in.
Reply
:iconjadsmor:
JadSMor Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013
I really don't know what to say, or rather I don't think there is anything that I could say that would quite match the gravity of what you had to go through.
 All I can say is that I feel bad that you had to go through it. I have ADHD, my brother has Auspergers, but that is as far as I can relate in that regard. Bullying impacted my life in a lot of ways, the worst was that for a long time I lacked the confidence that I could be good at anything but my school work. I had no reason to pursue any goals or passions because my automatic conclusion was that I was worthless and therefore wouldn't be able to develop any talent anyway. After elementary school I started to deal with the bullying differently. My low self-esteem turned into a lot of pent up rage and became my protection. A lot of the times kids would attempt to start something in school but I would escalate the situation so fast that they learned to back off and not push any buttons at all. (Example: kid was throwing fries at my back in lunch and laughing with his friends, I turned around once and warned him to stop, and then another fry hit me, so I walked over to him calmly grabbed his orange juice carton, opened it in front of him, and then poured it all over his meal and then the rest into his lap and walked away without saying anything). My world view after elementary school was pretty narrow. I basically considered every other person in the world except family and best friend idiots who weren't even worth my time, unless they proved to me that they were different. Basically my first thought on meeting anyone was "you're a stupid jerk just like the rest of the world and until I see otherwise nothing you say or do has any relevance in my life". I never once considered grabbing a gun and doing a school shooting but I certainly thought that if someone else did I wouldn't shed any tears for anyone who happened to be shot if it happened. I decided that I didn't need other people in my life, that I could be just fine by myself and have fun by myself, and succeed by myself and for the most part I was right. It wasn't until after high school that I really started breaking down my barriers and being open to people again. 

But compared to you I had a cake walk, but that is my frustration with this whole situation. Is that what I went through was hard and it messed me up pretty bad for a while, and what you went through was worse, there are millions of other people that go through crap too and it messes them up as well. I just wonder how much untapped talent and potential and good there is in the world that isn't being expressed because of the damage put downs and harassment does. 

But one thing that I have learned is that the best thing to do is forgive and move on. I had the hardest time with that for the longest time, I always thought that if I forgave those kids that did this to me it was like they were getting away with it. But I've come to realize that by letting things go, I am freeing myself more than them. By giving the situation to God, I don't have to worry about it any more. It's not my problem. I can be who I want to be and do what I want to do without carrying that extra baggage around. I'm not perfect, and I still have moments where if I hear a certain name it brings me back to mind one of those individuals and I get a little anger that bubbles up, but its the act of striving to forgive that is freeing I know it will probably take a good while more before I can completely move on, but that's okay. 

Ultimately its the here and now that matters, and right here and right now I feel good about who I am and what I'm trying to accomplish with my life. 

Dell, or Megan (since this whole thing was so personal I'm not sure which you would prefer so I apologize if you didn't want to bring real names into it. Just to make it even mine is Jared)
Right here and now you're an amazing person. You are unique in who and what you are and that's a good thing. You have talent, you have charity for others, and you have quite literally unlimited potential available to you and your future. Each and every person on this planet has divinity inside of them. Some people reject that divinity by choice and they become carnal and base, but even then it is still there.  By continual pursuit of that which is good and right you can expand that potential, that light inside, until it not only lights your own path, but becomes a beacon to others around you. No matter how things go for you always remember that you have that light inside and that no one can take it away from you. Ultimately we will receive that which we seek in this life, if we diligently seek after good things then good will find us, likewise if we continually seek after the carnal in life then it will find us.  I know it sounds corny but this is something I have a testimony of, I know it is true. I wish I could say more, but unfortunately we did meet over the internet and I fear that I may have already crossed too many lines, the last thing I want to do is creep you out. 

To bring things back to the earth here. Thanks for your comments and support on my art. It brings a smile to my face, so you should keep one on yours.
Reply
Add a Comment: